A fine chocolate is like a fine wine—full-flavored, delicately structured, and inadvisable to consume while operating a Segway. Today’s Groupon gives you the keys to the chocolate kingdom, with a $25 box of two-dozen signature truffles from The Cocoa Tree, a $50 value. With the option to individually select each of your 24 truffles, this customizable deal will have your head dancing with myriad chocolate combinations in anticipation of your trip to The Cocoa Tree’s Germantown store, where you will issue your chocolaty decrees and pronounce summary judgment on which truffles gain entry to your kingdom.
The truffles are handmade by skilled human chocolatiers, who are good enough to hold a position usually reserved for elves. Meanwhile, handpicking the truffle contents is left up to you and your taste buds. The wide variety of options allows you to construct a box of chocolates whose diversity reflects your loftiest ideals. Many of the truffles are a result of romantic unions between daintily refined chocolate and bold Southern flavors. Sweet potatoes, Jack Daniel’s whiskey, and sweat tea are some of the ingredients in these unique recipes. The truffles are appealing enough to have been given and gotten by such celebrities as Nicole Kidman, Faith Hill, Former President Bush, and Count Chocula.
A box of truffles is well enough enjoyed solo, but bringing a friend into the mix only increases the euphoria. You know those emphatic faces you make to express how delicious something tastes? Truffles tastes even better when your eyes roll back in your head and you say, "Uh ma gawd, vis is dewishus." But if you ever did that alone, strangers would think you were strange, because it is strange to be expressive while alone. So socialize while you chocolatize by telling a friend about today’s deal, giving a box as a gift, or mustering up enough kindness to part ways with one of your tasty treats.
A review on the blog No Time Lost gives the chocolate shop four out of five stars and describes the reviewer’s experience as a Cocoa Tree first-timer:
- ...my attention went straight to the plentiful rows and the generous variety of truffles themselves, in unusual flavors including Coriander Coconut, Sweet Potato, Chambord, Margarita, Guinness, and Ginger. We each chose two flavors to try, and in a matter of minutes we pulled up to a window table with our truffles and hot chocolate (with obligatory marshmallows) and entered pure cocoa bliss, feeling more as if we were in Paris than Germany. – Amy C., No Time Lost
- I tried this place on the suggestion of a friend - and I am so glad. These are the best chocolates I have ever had (& believe me, I've had plenty!). Amazing variety of unique flavors...my favorite is the Chai truffle. Completely recommend this place for any chocolate lover! – tamalyn, Citysearch
- Beautiful selection of truffles, smiling faces to greet you, warm atmosphere, and, oh yeah...THE TRUFFLES are unbelievable. You'll be hooked. – Niketa H., Yelp
Thy Silver Tongue
Humanity’s true greatness lies in the ability to enjoy candy, a pleasure somewhat shared by animal brethren, but completely lost on modern robots, who, despite many other technological advances (deadly titanium claws, 9-pin firewire ports), tragically lack a sense of taste. Groupon’s own resident robot, Adonis 12, sampled some confectionary creations and gave us these literally tasteless reviews:
Chocolate-Covered Pretzels: “These sweet, twisted falsehoods betray no difference from their bare-flesh counterparts, to my indifferent jaws. Both mash with similar yielding resignation.”
Wax Bottles: “The translucent blue liquid contained within these wax pouches serves as a soothing lubricant to my gyroscopic balance unit, but nothing more. Oh, to be a man.”
Pixy Stix: “This tube of raw, uncompromising sugar is rapidly corroding my sensory matrix! The granules are corrupting my ethics calibrator! Quickly, deactivate my solar core, before I-…MUST…DESTROY…MANKIND.
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