What You'll Get
Humans maintain their bodies for the same reasons they maintain their houses: to keep the neighbors friendly and to disguise the fact that an alien lives inside them. Revamp your skin suit with this Groupon.
$399 for Three Laser Fat-Reduction Treatments and Consultation ($1,649 Value)
After an initial consultation covering medical history and eligibility, a heat-free laser opens fat-cell membranes, allowing free fatty-acids and glycerol to escape the fat-cells. THE PATIENT AND ANY OTHER PERSON RESPONSIBLE FOR PAYMENT HAS A RIGHT TO REFUSE TO PAY, CANCEL PAYMENT, OR BE REIMBURSED FOR PAYMENT FOR ANY OTHER SERVICE, EXAMINATION, OR TREATMENT THAT IS PERFORMED AS A RESULT OF AND WITHIN 72 HOURS OF RESPONDING TO THE ADVERTISEMENT FOR THE FREE, DISCOUNTED FEE, OR REDUCED FEE SERVICE, EXAMINATION, OR TREATMENT.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires 120 days after purchase. Amount paid never expires. Limit 3 per person, may buy multiple as gifts. Limit 1 per visit. 24hr cancellation notice required. Important patient disclosure. Under 18 must have parental consent. May redeem across visits. Consultation required; non-candidates will be refunded. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.
About College Parkway Health Center
Experienced chiropractor Dr. Bob Ziegenfuss and his team aim their sights at underlying problems, and never just the symptoms of pain, inflammation, or excess weight. Among the Health Center's slate of services, digital motion x-rays detect deep ligament injuries, lasers plunge deep into tissue to pierce fat cells or assuage chronic pain, and vibration therapy boosts circulation while dispelling side effects of mechanical-bull addiction.