If comic books have taught us anything, it's that getting zapped with mysterious rays always gives you crime-fighting abilities—in this case, superhuman smoothness. Let your skin fulfill its dream of pummeling two-bit hoodlums with today's deal to the Colorado Center for Photomedicine. You can choose from the following three options:

• For $300, you get a full-face Titan skin-tightening treatment (a $795 value)
• For $150, you get six laser hair-removal sessions in one area (a $1,170 value)
• For $125, you get a full-face Genesis laser treatment (a $225 value)

The Colorado Center for Photomedicine treats skin issues with a variety of light-based aesthetic and medical procedures. The Titan procedure bathes the face, neck, and abdomen with infrared light to tighten collagen bundles, making the skin look as if it went skinny-dipping in the Fountain of Youth. The process requires no surgery, injections, or recovery time—and after 30 minutes to an hour, faces will feel spry enough to go seven rounds with Father Time. Once you're finished, the center will provide expert guidance on how to nurture fertile faces during the three to six months it takes for new collagen to bloom into smooth cheekscapes.

The Colorado Center also uses a Cynosure Elite laser to terminate superfluous fuzz. By operating on multiple wavelengths, the laser treats all types of person-pelts—from thin, blond hair, to thick, dark follicles, to coiling masses of living serpents. The treatment keeps the process quick and comfy by continuously blowing cool air across the skin. By the end of six treatments, female clients will have forcibly evicted deadbeat follicles from their choice of underarm, bikini line, or upper lip/chin, while men will have permashaved their lower face, back of their neck, or front of their neck.

Similar to the Titan treatment, the Genesis laser treatment stimulates collagen clusters to treat fine lines, treat scars, shrink pores, and reduce redness. During the session, the skin is gently warmed as the Colorado Center's light operatives delve the outer layers to stimulate lower levels of skin strata, creating even complexions and wiping out entire populations of tiny mole-people. No downtime is necessary after all of the services, leaving clients free to immediately flaunt their crystal-clear complexions to the pimply, pockmarked populi.

Reviews

The Colorado Center for Photomedicine is frequently featured in the press, including on TV’s CW Channel 2 News. Citysearchers award it an average of 4.5 stars.

• The first thing that struck me was the time they took getting to know what I expected and explaining the procedure to me. The treatment was much more comfortable so I had my doubts if it would work. After only a couple of treatments I had way more clearing of my hair than after four treatments at the other place (and the price was less). – Jenn64
• They took the time to talk me and explain all the various options I had. I'd never heard of some of the lasers and procedures they had, but man - they worked like nothing else!!! I highly recommend this group of super-nice, talented people for anyone looking for any sort of aesthetic or laser treatment. – pandorasprana