To make un-fine wine, simply place grapes beneath a silk pillow, repeatedly mash your head against it, and then wring the pillowcase into a nearby mouth. Taste traditionally produced fine wines with today’s Groupon: for $20, you get a winery and vineyard tour, an etched wineglass, and a bottle of wine at The Crown Winery in Humboldt (up to a $40 value).

The Crown Winery’s vineyards flourish over a hill in Gibson County, providing plump grapes for processing on the grounds of the winery’s Tuscan-style villa. Tour both the vineyard and winery (a $15 value) to see the vino production in progress; the whole kit and caboodle is powered by a solar-energy system, which keeps the production facilities and picturesque villa in running order. This beautiful backdrop is an ideal setting for a romantic outing, an oenophilian flight of fancy with a group of friends, or an adrenaline-pumping thrillfest for clandestine grape assassins.

Friday nights at the winery light up with Wine Down evenings from 7 p.m. to 10 p.m., featuring live music and the welcome disappearance of an entire week’s worth of memories. In addition to the halcyon memories procured during the visit, you’ll go home with a souvenir etched Crown Winery glass, for use at home as a wine receptacle or makeshift melee weapon (a $5 value), and one bottle of your choice of the vineyard’s signature potations (up to a $20 value). Call or email to schedule your tour.

You must be 21 years of age or older to participate in the wine-tasting portion of this deal. The Crown Winery is closed on Mondays.