The Tooth Fairy is a burglarizing fetishist specializing in black-market ivory trade, and she must be stopped. Today’s Groupon helps keep teeth in mouths and out of the hands of maniacal, winged phantasms: for $59, you get a cleaning, exam, and x-rays at Dental Excellence in Independence (a $253 value).
Dental Excellence's five experienced doctors promote dental diligence through a wide-ranging slate of services. After parking in a cushioned chair to circle every conjunction in the provided magazines, clients saunter into one of 22 treatment rooms, where they can watch cable television and calm tense necks with a pillow. A toothologist then burnishes smile rocks and eliminates pernicious plaque during the cleaning ($76) before carrying out recon work on the palate with a complete oral exam ($64) to detect early signs of decay or resemblance to Burton Gilliam. After cleaning and examining the gums and mouth bones, the team will perform digital x-rays to view potential runaway teeth and malformed roots ($113). The full visit, like most transcontinental crab walks, takes approximately an hour and a half.
19501 E US Hwy. 40
Independence, Missouri 64055Get Directions