The diaries of Lewis and Clark are filled with cantankerous laments about having to tour the wilderness by foot and the startling lack of trailside fast-food options. Equip yourself with a discoverer's eyes and a robocop's wheels with today's Groupon to DeTours Touring in Old City. Choose between the following options:

• For $28, you get a 1.5-hour segway tour of Philadelphia on a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday (a $59 value).
• For $33, you get a 1.5-hour segway tour of Philadelphia on a Friday, Saturday, or Sunday (a $65 value).

DeTours Touring whisks stationary sightseers on seg-legs through a leisurely perambulation of the magnificent landmarks, charming neighborhoods, and majestic fjords of historic Philadelphia. Over the course of the 4-mile segway blue tour route, riders cruise past the Liberty Bell Center, Independence Hall, and Ben Franklin's helicopter pad. As groups include no more than six, historical inquirers will have ample opportunity to pose questions to their tour captain—questions about the history, architecture, and culture of Philadelphia are vastly preferred over questions about the shape of one's birthmark. Tours are offered at 1:30 p.m. year-round and at 4 p.m. April through September.

DeTours Touring conducts its tours rain or shine or Ragnarok—ponchos are available for sale in the office, and helmets and answers to frequently asked questions are provided free of charge. Enjoy all the fun of tearing through Philadelphia's byways and walkways in a Sherman tank without incurring costly bills for crushed mailboxes with a tour from DeTours Touring.

Reviews

KYW Newsradio recently featured DeTours Touring on its website. 29 TripAdvisors and 11 Yelpers give it a five-star average.