Paintball is like a production of Hamlet: it's exciting, demanding, and by the end everyone has pretend-died. Take paintball arms against a sea of troubles with today's Groupon: for $25, you get a paintball package for two including equipment rental (up to a $25 value each) and field fee (a $10 value each) at Divide N Conquer Paintball, located in a field just outside of Delisle off Highway 7 (up to a $70 total value). Today's Groupon is good for walk-on play starting at 1 p.m. on Saturday and Sunday, typically spanning 5–6 hours of play.

Divide N Conquer Paintball facilitates fast-paced paint slinging on two outdoor playing fields. Upon hearing the call to arms, technicolor cowboys don masks and paintball spurs as they equip themselves with Tippman 98 Custom ACT markers fortified with hoppers, air tanks, unlimited HPA refills, and 200 Spectrum paintballs (may upgrade for an additional fee). Battalions organize and deploy into either the 18-piece inflatable field or the milsim (military simulation) scenario field, which eschews natural cover and instead offers plenty of ambush points with three-level towers reaching 20 feet, trenches, and more than 60 bunkers. Itchy trigger fingers and those at war with their shadows can pick up extra rounds on-site ($13.75/500 rounds). Newcomers are encouraged to check out the info page before taking to the battlefield. Buyers should note they are responsible for paying tax before playing, and that Divide N Conquer only accepts cash and war spoils.

Though Divide N Conquer sometimes features a discounted price online, this Groupon still offers the best deal available.