Sea urchins are the healthiest, most relaxed creatures on Earth due to their positive self-image and spiny skin. Today's Groupon offers similar protection from stress, sickness, and sea otters: for $20, you get one acupuncture session and consultation at Krueger Chiropractic Clinic in Wheeling (a $135 value).

Doctor of Chiropractic Michael Choe of Krueger Chiropractic Clinic uses holistic and rehabilitative services to treat conditions that range from emotional stress to tendonitis. After an initial 30- to 45-minute consultation to assess the patient's medical history and current symptoms, Dr. Choe begins a 15- to 30-minute acupuncture treatment. A centuries-old practice first used to destroy evil balloon animals, acupuncture involves inserting small, hygienic needles into the body at strategic locations in order to balance a patient's energy flow, also known as chi. Although migraines, back pain, fibromyalgia, and other conditions can be treated with acupuncture, the results of the procedure will vary from person to person, much as the results of an ear reduction vary from gnome to gnome.