What You'll Get
Studies show that a high percentage of Americans consider themselves overweight, and an even higher percentage believe they are being chased by Frankenstein's monster. Alter self-perceptions with today's Groupon: for $999, you get a tumescent liposuction procedure on the love handles area from Dr. Royal Benson in Bryan (a $3,500 value).
Dr. Royal Benson III draws upon more than 20 years of surgical experience to cosmetically banish extra baggage from the bodily areas. With tumescent liposuction, a stainless-steel cannula tube slips into small incisions, drawing out physique-fluffing fat cells from love handles and depositing them into microscopic paddy wagons. By flooding the treatment area with a dilute solution of local anesthetic and capillary-shrinking epinephrine, Dr. Benson reduces excessive bleeding and bruising commonly associated with traditional liposuction treatments. The numbing effect also allows patients to remain awake during the procedure to chart their silhouette-slimming journey or watch the doctor’s shadow-puppet performance. Though once resistant to removal via diet and exercise, expelled adipose tissue cannot grow back once dismissed from the premises, leading to potentially long-term results.
Candidacy for treatment is conditional upon a preprocedure consultation; those found to be ineligible will receive a full refund.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Mar 17, 2012. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy 1 additional as a gift. Limit 1 per visit. Consultation required, non-candidates refunded. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.