What You'll Get
Written by Bing Liu, a sixth-grade student at Lincoln Elementary School and an ace wordsmith in the 826CHI writing program.
Like Superman, martial arts can be useful when dealing with crimes and crazy grandmas. Teach your fists to fly like Superman with today’s Groupon: for $40, you get one month of unlimited kids’ mixed martial arts classes at Emerald Smoke (a $90 value).
At Emerald Smoke, kids develop life skills and confidence while getting rid of excess energy through the roundhouse kicks and swift, stealthy punches of no-contact mixed martial arts (MMA). During 45-minute classes held Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, kids aged 8 to 15 are separated into two different age groups (8- to 12-year-olds and 13- to 15-year-olds) to dodge and swerve with experienced teachers. Like attacking a cake with a bulldozer, students surprise professional MMA fighters with jabs and kicks. Mixed martial arts mixes the studies of jujitsu, muay thai, kickboxing, and boxing, helping kids learn self-discipline and respect for themselves and others. Another important skill students learn is self-defense, which will help make kids feel as safe as a whale in a tank without having to actually fight. MMA classes also help use up excess energy while building the tiny muscles of kids’ arms, legs, and abs into Hulk-size muscles.
With dusty-colored bricks and a regulation octagon-shaped fighting cage, Emerald Smoke’s gym space is like a warehouse packed with Everlast speed-punching bags, boxing gloves, and fitness equipment.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Sep 29, 2011. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy 1 additional as a gift. Limit 1 per visit. Must activate by 9/29/11, membership expires 1 month from activation date. Subject to availability. Valid for ages 8-15. Must sign waiver. New members only. Non-transferable. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.