According to Newton's Fourth Law, the more you drive your car, the more debris it attracts—repelling aerodynamics, the opposite gender, and gravity itself. Smooth your horseless carriage's exterior with today's deal at Evergreen Car Wash. Choose from the following options:
- For $59, you get an Ultimate Detail (a $119 value)
- For $25, you get five Ultimate Washes (a $54.95 value)
The friendly family of ride-primpers at Evergreen Car Wash has been meticulously returning messy motor vehicles to long-lasting luminescence for more than 15 years. The Ultimate Wash slathers on two kinds of soap during a soft-cloth machine wash: one to clean and shine the exterior glass and chrome, and another to gently remove tough soil and pollutants from the paint. Tires and rims then get mechanically de-gunked and shined before an attendant polishes your car to a brilliant Technicolor with red, yellow, and blue wax. Your car's soft, tickly underbelly is then sprayed with rust flush to protect the tenderest cuts of auto meat. Finally, a clear-coat protectant will inhibit gunkification caused by salt, dust, dirt, and rain.
The all-encompassing Ultimate Detail does everything the Ultimate Wash does, then sweeps your car off its wheel-feet with a showroom-quality blitz of detailing. A nimble-fingered attendant will power-wash wheel wells and rockers before removing bugs and tar. Next, Evergreen will dress exterior moldings and the dashboard, as well as dress any children found inside the car in adorable sailor suits. Vacuums and shampoos will oust any dust colonies populating the dark corners of floors, mats, and cloth seats, and newly glossy doorjambs, rims, and tires will gleam with the envious reflections of passersby. All glass will be polished inside and out and the exterior will be lovingly waxed by hand. An additional charge applies for large or excessively soiled vehicles.
Evergreen Car Wash's downtown location makes lunchtime vehicular makeovers a cinch, and the personable, knowledgeable staff will keep skittish sedans docile without having to resort to tranquilizer darts. Call to make an appointment.
Large or excessively soiled vehicles may incur an additional charge.