Unlike saving face, saving fuel does not require backtracking on bold-faced claims that Pluto is most definitely still a planet. Stand strong in your convictions with today’s Groupon: for $35, you get a fuel-saver auto-service package at EZ Quick Lube in Excelsior Springs (a $125 value). This package includes an oil change, fuel-injection cleaning, and tire rotation.
EZ Quick Lube’s mechanical gurus delight automotive owners with the care and scrutiny of their service, decanting a deluge of fresh oil into filth-ridden engines and massaging tires into peak performance. Taking their cue from New Deal politicians, a crew of oil-change specialists arranges a stimulus package for each car’s fuel economy that decreases engine-taxing sludge and returns oil to the liquefied gold standard. Technicians then perform a fuel-injection cleaning to maintain proper engine performance and ensure that pressurized fuel is optimally converted into a flammable mist for efficient burning. A tire rotation moves and twists wheels to even out their wear over time. The approximately 45-minute vehicle treatment can be performed on any automotive make and model and takes place in one of three service bays while customers wait in an air-conditioned waiting room and sniff their complimentary oil-scented air freshener.