Making one’s own clothes requires corralling a herd of sheep, feeding them rainbows to dye them different colors, and a hiring professional hairdresser to braid them into sweaters. Outfit yourself in a more practical manner with today’s stylish Groupon: for $20, you get $50 worth of apparel and accessories at Funk & Standard Variety Store. This Groupon is good at both the Westfield and the Red Bank locations.
Stocked with a head-spinning selection of clothing, housewares, gifts, and accessories, Funk & Standard Variety Store offers myriad selections for women, men, and tykes standing atop another’s shoulders to schemily get a bank loan. Bolster outdated wardrobes and supply seafaring carracks for trans-Atlantic voyages with fashionable threads like the '80s party dress ($24), the Made In New Jersey tee ($22), or a denim tennis dress ($24). Customers can accessorize bland cave dwellings or spruce up clown costumes with gifts such as a backwards clock ($14) and a pair of Fun Wayfarer sunglasses ($8). Funk & Standard invites its guests to soak in the lively atmosphere doused in stacks of chromatic trinkets and threads, a direct result of the Beatles introducing color to America in 1964.
Fill up on a backpack’s worth of clothing for your dorm room closet, or cleverly trick the English lit course you teach by dressing as a student and living among them for the duration of the semester before revealing your true identity just moments before the final exam. Both Funk & Standard locations offer easy parking, allowing clients to back up their personal semi-rigs to the entrance to load up on the fashionable goods.
Every morning, Yummy Good's owners rise, pluck fresh fruits and vegetables from their crates, and cast them into presses to squeeze every last drop of juice out. The resulting bottled concoctions – which blend the liquids of raw fruits and veggies into flavors such as rabbit juice or lemon love – wait to be picked up by or delivered to thirsty clients. With juice in hand, customers cleanse their insides with infusions of pure, raw nutrients in prescribed three- to five-day plans.