After illegal squatting in neighborhood attics and actually being a protoplasmic entity, having pale skin is the leading cause of being mistaken for a ghost. Avoid accidental exorcisms with today's Groupon: for $12, you get one Mystic HD spray tan or ultra bronze high-pressure tanning-bed session at Golden Spa Nail Hair & Tan (a $25 value).
Using advanced spray-tanning formulas and advanced tanning beds, Golden Spa imbues hueless hides with colorful radiance. With the Mystic HD spray-tan session, customers stand in a cozy heated booth while a mechanical chromagician casts a fine mist that pigments skin tents using a safe, effective DHA-infused concoction. The added heat factor ensures dryness and comfort, while also allowing optimal absorption for longer-lasting tans that don't wash off from crying while watching The Love Boat reruns.
Traditional golden glowites can opt for the ultra-bronze tanning-bed session to get an enduring sunkissed glow in a short amount of time. The 18-minute tanning bed employs a high-powered body fan for laying down a base shade or maintaining a currently brazen hue, tinting organ husks evenly and thoroughly without uncomfortable issues common to lesser beds, such as spontaneous combustion into song.