What You'll Get
If left untamed, natural beauty releases a potent musk that attracts wild-eyed stallions, aggressive landscape photographers, and packs of feral Fabios. Subdue sublime scents with today's Groupon: for $75, you get $150 worth of colored mulch from 1-888-Got-Mulch. Groupon may be used towards the extra $75 fee for delivery, available in the Kansas City metro area for orders of 3 cubic yards or more.
The wood-shredding workers at 1-888-Got-Mulch help homeowners protect and prettify yards by delivering colored mulch directly to the homeowner's landscape. Dyed with 1-888-Got-Mulch's patented water-based pigment, each colorful mulch variety exists as a safe, ground-bound blanket for tender shrubs and invading pet rhinos. Customers can choose from six weather-resistant hues, including coffee-inspired Kona brown ($50 per cubic yard) and bark-accentuating amber red ($50 per cubic yard). The fresh scent of shredded cedar ($50 per cubic yard) makes insects head for the hills, and safety chips ($35 per cubic yard) provide soft, all-natural padding for playground equipment and second-grade sumo matches. All mulches also pack the power to keep weeds at bay, infusing the soil with nutrients while quietly smothering intruders.
To help the homeowners determine the required amount of mulch, 1-888-Got-Mulch offers a handy online calculator and a friendly telephone help line. Likewise, unlike many other chip conveyors, the delivery team lines the ground with plastic before unloading, preventing neighborhood speculation regarding any mysterious driveway skid marks.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Apr 18, 2012. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person. Limit 1 per order. By appointment only. May use Groupon towards required $75 delivery fee; delivery valid only for metropolitan Kansas City; delivery not valid for orders less than 3 cubic yards. Mulch trucks may crack driveways. No cash value. Not valid with other offers. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.