In addition to the humiliation of being buried by dogs and dug up by science teachers, skeletons are ornery because they lack the musculature necessary to get massaged. Avoid taking your skin for granted with today's Groupon: for $30, you get a one-hour therapeutic massage at Greater Pittsburgh Joint and Muscle Center on Iron City Drive (an $80 value). A full-service wellness center, Greater Pittsburgh Joint and Muscle Center relaxes stressed bodies with massage services, chiropractic services, and sports and injury rehabilitation. Settle in for a 60-minute therapeutic massage while the mitten-fillers of a master therapist skate smooth circles and figure eights on the surface of your back, boosting circulation, oxygenating muscles, and promoting peacefulness. Shed stress from overworked shoulders and exhausted back muscles before returning to the sadistic demands of an office job featuring finger-restraint laden keyboards and backless desk chairs.
Greater Pittsburgh Joint and Muscle Center
Chiropractic medicine and massage therapy join forces at Greater Pittsburgh Joint and Muscle Center, a wellness studio helmed by chiropractic doctor Frank J. Verri. Here, licensed massage therapists ferry minds and muscles toward states of relaxation that are deeper and more satisfying than a moon crater filled with homemade chili. To dissolve painful knots and unclench tense muscles, they borrow Eastern techniques such as foot reflexology to augment Western modalities such as deep-tissue massage. Swedish bodywork teems with long, gliding strokes and gentle taps that awaken endorphins and promote blood flow, sending oxygen coursing into corporeal outliers such as fingers, toes, and conjoined invisible friends. In addition to kneading sinews and adjusting spines, attentive staffers help clients boost their nutrition IQs with diet consultations and weight-loss programs.