Having to wait for wet nail polish to dry curbs people's natural urges to plunge fingers into frosting, or to tickle the mailman too hard. Skip the wait with today's Groupon: for $15, you get a CND Shellac manicure or a deluxe pedicure at Happy Nails (a $30 value).
The trained polish-technicians at Happy Nails beautify appendages with careful colorings. During the approximately 30- to 45-minute Shellac manicure, an aesthetician shapes and buffs fingernails and trims away cuticles. Shellac nail polish laminates nails in colors with a finish that remains vibrant through up to three weeks of coaxing dissonant chords from chalkboards alongside avant garde third-grade musicians. The deluxe pedicure takes place in a massaging pedicure chair, which robotically relaxes shoulders and backs while toenails are transformed from haggard scraggles into delicate ovals. A sea salt scrub works away at calluses that might otherwise damage human-sock diplomacy and ruin future puppet shows, after which feet are glossed with a sheen of silky oil before being polished. Both the Shellac manicure and deluxe pedicure also include a relaxing massage from human hands.