What You'll Get
In addition to experiencing the humiliation of being buried by dogs and dug up by science teachers, skeletons are ornery because they lack the musculature necessary to get massaged. Avoid taking your skin for granted with today's Groupon: for $37, you get a one-hour deep-tissue massage at Haptic Bodywork, located inside the Spunk Fitness Center (a $75 value).
Licensed massage therapist Robert Pumphrey helms Haptic Bodywork with a no-nonsense approach to eliminating pain and stress in a clinical massage environment. The deep-tissue massage uses medium to deep pressure to undo knots as swiftly as a sailor in a yo-yo contest. Robert also uses long strokes to lengthen muscles, gradually realigning layers of muscle and connective tissue dwelling beneath the skin's surface. This particular massage can address sports-related discomfort, as well as other pains resulting from growing up with Kirk Cameron.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Aug 2, 2012. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy 2 additional as gifts. Limit 1 per visit. By appointment only. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.
About Haptic Bodywork
With 13 years of experience, Robert Pumphrey knows a thing or two about chilling out. As a licensed massage therapist, he uses soothing strokes to help clients release stress. At Haptic Bodywork, his massage and bodywork clinic, he draws upon more than a half dozen massage modalities to target aches and anxiety. Services range from reflexology sessions, which can improve posture and reduce foot-based tension, to Hawaiian lomi-lomi massage, a series of gentle, rhythmic strokes that mimic the Pacific Ocean's waves, in that they feel great after you roam aimlessly through the desert for six weeks.