Like traffic patterns, the human digestive system is variable: sometimes it's jammed, sometimes it flows smoothly, and sometimes it's broadcast live from a helicopter. Get in the fast lane with today's Groupon to Healing Waters Health and Wellness Clinic. This Groupon is good at both Peoria and Phoenix locations. Choose between the following services:

• For $75, you get the ultimate colonic with colonic hydrotherapy, an infrared-sauna session, a hot-stone massage, a dietician consultation, and a probiotic (a $150 value).
• For $45, you get a deluxe colonic with colonic hydrotherapy cleansing with an infrared-sauna session and a hot-stone massage (a $100 value).

At Healing Waters Health and Wellness Clinic, an expert crew of certified colon hydrotherapists gently disperses harmful internal debris. Built-up intestinal toxins can be the root cause of many health concerns, since the immune system often summers in the electrolyte and vitamin-absorbing colon. The deluxe colonic hydrotherapy session ($100) gives cluttered byways a refreshing spring cleaning with a gentle, discreet treatment that irrigates while it invigorates, like a macchiato sprinkler. This colonic can also fortify the immune system and instigate weight loss. Afterward, toxins evaporate in a steamy infrared sauna, and a hot-stone massage smothers any lingering tension.

The ultimate colonic ($150) provides a bonus round to the deluxe package with a 20-minute dietician consultation. This session teaches guests how to keep their hallowed halls hollow, providing a nutritional blueprint along with a high-vitamin probiotic fix to aid in overall colon health.