What You'll Get
The Tooth Fairy is a burglarizing fetishist specializing in black-market ivory trade, and she must be stopped. Keep teeth in mouths and out of the hands of maniacal, winged phantasms with today's Groupon: for $69, you get an initial consultation for adult cosmetic orthodontics, including X-rays and impressions, plus $1,000 toward a Six Month Smiles Treatment (a $283 value) at Howard County Family Dentistry in West Friendship.
Seasoned dentist Dr. Thomas J. Fenlon, DDS helps patients achieve winning smiles through a toothsome array of cosmetic, preventative, and restorative dental services. During an initial consultation to determine candidacy for adult cosmetic orthodontics (a $135 value), the dental doyen administers a set of X-rays (a $43 value) to assess structural damage beneath the surface. Patients then chomp down on a malleable material to create a set of doppelganger tooth impressions (a $105 value), which grant Dr. Fenlon an additional view of enamel fencing, and make the perfect host gift for a mixer at Stephen King's house.
If Dr. Fenlon determines the patient to be a good candidate for adult cosmetic orthodontics, Groupon purchasers will receive $1,000 toward Six Month Smiles (total cost $4,500), a nearly invisible orthodontic treatment that bonds mouth ivory with clear brackets and tooth-colored wirings, which corrals wayward cuspids into a cosmetically pleasing row in approximately six months.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Feb 4, 2012. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy 3 additional as gifts. Limit 1 per visit. Not valid for patients with certain dental conditions. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.