Humans shed their skin each season by rubbing against rocks or watching scary movies until they're frightened out of it. Shuck your husk the civilized way with today's Groupon: for $40, you get a chocolate body polish (an $80 value) at Hyde Park Body Works.
The skilled massage therapists at Hyde Park Body Works rub radiance and vigor into tired and tense bodies with stress-busting spa treatments. The chocolate body polish exfoliates customers for a full hour, its intoxicatingly creamy scent inspiring relaxation and daydreams about backstroking in a giant chocolate fondue fountain. A professional pamperer gently polishes away dryness and impurities, leaving skin as hydrated and smooth as a freshly watered stairwell. After a luxurious shower, patrons enjoy a rich body-butter massage to seal in moisture and protect the newly exfoliated epidermis from harsh wind, itchy sweaters, and tickle fights with Johnny Sandpaperhands.