More people than ever are living a sedentary lifestyle: waking up in their racecar beds, driving to work in their racecars, sitting for eight hours in the passenger seats of experimental racecars as men in lab coats slam them into concrete walls, and then driving home again. Race to a slim physique without moving with today’s Groupon: for $54, you get a fat-burning package at Infinite Vitality Weight Loss in Clearwater (a $175 total value). The package includes the following:
- Five MIC injections (a $150 value)
- One bottle of 120 calcium-pyruvate capsules (a $25 value)
The weight-loss experts at Infinite Vitality Weight Loss help clients slip into sleek bodies with MIC injections infused with vitamins and amino acids as well as capsules combining calcium and pyruvic acid. The injections’ powerful serum of methionine, inositol, and choline aims to break down fat reserves and flush out bodily toxins. Calcium pyruvate combines bone-strengthening calcium with pyruvic acid, commonly found in cheese and red wine. The combination boosts cellular respiration to help cells burn energy, and it encourages glucose to jump from the bloodstream into muscles that need it to lift dumbbells and hug postal workers. The MIC injections may rev up sluggish metabolisms, bolster liver function, prevent fatigue, and reduce bad cholesterol. For best results, clients should combine the injections with a healthy, low-calorie diet and exercise, such as digging a new Olympic-size lap pool for their igloo.
THE PATIENT AND ANY OTHER PERSON RESPONSIBLE FOR PAYMENT HAS A RIGHT TO REFUSE TO PAY, CANCEL PAYMENT, OR BE REIMBURSED FOR PAYMENT FOR ANY OTHER SERVICE, EXAMINATION, OR TREATMENT THAT IS PERFORMED AS A RESULT OF AND WITHIN 72 HOURS OF RESPONDING TO THE ADVERTISEMENT FOR THE FREE, DISCOUNTED FEE, OR REDUCED FEE SERVICE, EXAMINATION, OR TREATMENT.