What You'll Get
Like Samson's, a man's physical strength is directly proportional to the length of his hair, which is why the Beatles spent most of the 1960s crushing classical marble busts with their bare hands. Trade some strength for a new look with today's Groupon: for $90, you get a 30-minute full-body massage and two signature full-services at John Allan's in the Loop (a $185 value).
Set in a luxurious penthouse with views of the city, the seasoned staff at John Allan's men's grooming club can smarten up masculine meat-suits with a variety of relaxing treatments. Combining Swedish and deep-tissue techniques, the full-body massage relieves muscular tension in a half-hour mollycoddling ($55). Following that, one of two Full Service grooming sessions ($65) begins with a shampoo and scalp massage to cleanse tresses and wipe out previous incarnations before fortifying hair with a conditioning treatment. After a soothing hot towel, the friendly mane mavens shape unruly strands into masterful works of follicular art. Finally, a shoe shine buffs classic men's oxfords and shines macho moccasins, and a cuticle caretaker issues a no-frills manicure to ensure hands appear inviting to during global high-five summits. Relive the relaxation on a subsequent visit with an included second full grooming session.
Located in a 5,000-square-foot penthouse, John Allan's club sports high ceilings, a bar and billiards table, and flat-screen TVs, so suave chaps can relax in the lap of luxury without hurting the balky knees of a wealthy great uncle. Complete with a complimentary beverage, these gratifying treatments are a cheerful ending to a long day or a smooth beginning to a long night out shaking down ex-cons for gardening tips.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Sep 21, 2011. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1/person, may buy 2 additional as gifts. Limit 1 per visit. By appointment only. 24hr cancellation required. New clients only. Valid only for listed services and at listed location. May redeem across multiple visits. Gratuity not included. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.