If your shady parking spot rests beneath bird-filled trees or someone scrawled carpetbagger into the inch of dirt on your car window, Johnny’s Car Wash on Beechmont Avenue can give your vehicle its original off-the-lot shine. For $10, today's Groupon gets you one premium wash (a $21 value). This deal isn't just great for sprucing up your own car; it also makes the perfect passive-aggressive gift for your dirty carpool driver.
The auto beauticians at Johnny’s Car Wash treat every auto with tender, hull-pleasing care, thoroughly preparing all coupes and carriages for their moment in the streetlight. The premium-wash package eschews the harsh brushes of scratchy gas-station washes, using nothing but downy cloths and puffy cirrus clouds to protect the vehicle’s finish. The environmentally safe process uses fresh, soft water for each wash, along with polymer soaps that pull dirt to the surface like a soapy torricellian vacuum.
Windows and mirrors are cleaned and tires and wheels are cleared of the muck from last night's marshmallow mudding, then left as shiny as a 35-psi dime. Johnny's shine savants then dry the exterior and door jams with their car-calming hands and vacuum the interior to remove all evidence of Lilliputian ticker-tape parades. The oft-neglected underbody is thoroughly washed, removing funk and gunk from under the trunk, and the rest of the buggy basks in Johnny’s triple-polymer clear-coat polish, which, combined with a clear-coat protectant, is like taking the car for a a high-rev mani-pedi.