Politicians tend to rack up heftier dry-cleaning fees than most, as they must sweat through close congressional votes and pledge to keep our nation’s fabric untarnished. Take an oath of cleanliness with today’s Groupon to K Cleaners in Coconut Grove. Choose between the following options:
- For $20, you get $40 worth of dry cleaning.
- For $50, you get a wedding-gown cleaning and pressing (a $120 value). Gowns must have a normal-size trail.<p>
The accommodating staff at K Cleaners––an environmentally conscious dry-cleaning service committed to making sullied duds sparkle once more––expertly expurgates stains in clothing of all cuts and sizes. Fabrics inhale wafts of nontoxic air as they swiftly pass through an advanced cleaning facility designed to protect them from the suffocating waters of the average spin-cycle. Professionals trained in alternative cleaning techniques can capably restore a wide range of vestments, from tuxedo suits ($16.95) inexplicably worn to paintball matches to ties ($3.50) fashioned into zip lines for harrowing escapes from drab dinner parties. Pants ($6.49) stained by scalding coffee return to their owners after a cool blast of cleanliness, and sweaters ($6.99) take a refreshing breather between back-to-back holiday parties. For $1 extra, cleaners will tackle notoriously delicate materials such as linen, silk, and rayon.
Brides-to-be and brides-that-were can take advantage of K Cleaners’ wedding-gown service to ensure that their most cherished dress shines with effervescent whiteness for years to come. After cleaning away bits of cake and the salty residue of joyful tears, experts press the family heirloom back to store-bought perfection. Though not included in this Groupon, cleaners can also package dresses with archival materials that defend against humidity, contaminants, and crazed bouquet-catchers.