Household grime, if left unchecked, will inevitably develop into miniature civilizations whose complex network of treaties erupts into a devastating house-wide reenactment of World War I. Today’s Groupon spares you the trouble of tripping over tiny trenches: for $49, you get three hours of house-cleaning services from Keep It Clean Housekeeping (a $90 value). This Groupon is good for Orange County residents located in the cities listed in the sidebar.

Keep It Clean's highly trained technicians wage war on grime with standard household cleaners tailored to a variety of surfaces. A friendly ground guardian will customize a cleaning plan to your space and ensure that accumulated soil, grit, Lego helmets, and butter statues of cows eating sticks of butter are tossed off the premises. Keep bathrooms, kitchens, and living rooms looking new and tasting splendid with the services of either two cleaners for a total of 90 minutes or one cleaning maven for three hours. Purchase two Groupons to summon two cleaners for three hours, or challenge one house cleaner to perform six hours of cleaning while balancing on his or her elbow. Additional cleaning time can be purchased at the regular rate ($30 an hour).

Dirty floors can turn your home from a castle to a cage, persuading you to abandon your home and start a new life 500 yards beneath the earth's surface. Ensure that children have clean surfaces on which to crawl, and treat your toes to a sterile new terrain. Call ahead to schedule your appointment.

Reviews

Though Keep It Clean does not yet have many reviews, its Carpet Care department received a five-star average from Google Mappers:

• To keep this short, i was amazed by the effiency [sic] and thouroughness [sic] of this company. – Bill
• These guy [sic] were prompt and very friendly. – Jason