Long ago, Scottish polo players longed for a game where they could explore scenic terrain, ride an obedient mechanical horse, and wear more courageously plaid knickers. Prepare clubs for sporting conquests with today's Groupon: for $11, you get two club-detailing packages at Kelowna Springs Golf Club on Penno Road (a $22.40 value).

Golfers prepare their clubs for 18-hole dominance with a full cleaning in Kelowna Springs Golf Club's locally invented, self-service Club Detailer machine. Lounging in the staging area next to the clubhouse, the Club Detailer employs environmentally amicable ultrasonic frequencies to restore club heads and grips to their newborn state. Players place two full sets of orb launchers into the machine's cleansing compartments, and over the course of 5–10 minutes, the Club Detailer loosens debris and primes rigid irons for fairway waltzes using heated water, biodegradable soap, and high-frequency vibrations. The machine's fastidious cleaning also grooms grips and restores their original tackiness by sloughing away skin oils, sunscreen, and outdated band-aids. Clients then preen putters and fluff matted drivers using the machine's expedient blow-dry stage. Like a sumo-wrestler covered in Jello, clubs are ready for competition immediately after cleaning.