Staying in luxury hotels has proven both warmer and quieter than lodging in a blue whale's echoing stomach. Rest easy on dry land with today's Groupon: for $269, you get a two-night stay in the Season’s Bay building, welcome cocktails for two, breakfast for two each morning, and two rounds of golf (up to a $570 total value) at The Lodge of Four Seasons, located in Lake Ozark.

The rich history and award-winning hospitality of The Lodge of Four Seasons have entertained guests since the inn opened its doors in 1964. After a cocktail welcome ($14 value), guests unpack for a two-night stay in a Season’s Bay room, which looks out on the Lake of the Ozarks and looks inward at a king bed, two double beds, or its inner child jumping on both. Nearby parking and a private pool allow visitors to easily house and bathe their cars.

A round of play for two golfers at the par-72 Ridge Course, a championship golfscape designed by Ken Kavanaugh, challenges intrepid club-wielders with zoysia fairways, elevation changes, and adventurous pin placements. Tee times must be reserved for starts later than 11 a.m. Buffet-style breakfasts at Breezes Restaurant (a $17 value per person per day) are consumed in a windowed atrium with a view of the resort’s famous Japanese gardens, where wild haikus grow slowly from the mouths of resident poet-trees.

Though not included in this Groupon, The Lodge of Four Seasons houses a deluxe day spa and lists a wealth of local activities. Take a wave runner out onto Lake of the Ozarks, test the steadiness of your hand at trap shooting, or try both at the same time.