MB2 Raceway, as seen in the CSI episode “A La Cart,” is offering two 14-lap races and 15% off a one-year membership if you want. Head to either the Thousand Oaks or the Sylmar tracks and get your race on for just $23—that’s 57% off a $53 value for the package.

The quarter-mile indoor MB2 circuits have 11 turns with laps averaging around 30 seconds. Post your best times on the MB2 website to compete for your share of Internet motorsports glory.

Membership benefits include:

• One free race at the date of purchase
• One free race in your birthday month
• Two races for $25 every Monday for a year
• Two races for $20 every Tuesday for a year
• One free race when you buy two races every Wednesday for a year

If you choose to buy a membership (normally $50), this Groupon gives it to you for $42.50.

But if you choose not to get the membership, you can sill enjoy two go-kart races at MB2. These tracks are for serious kart-men and kart-women: MB2’s roster of spokesmen includes a former IndyCar race winner and current IRL team owner. Their karts, the product of an exclusive partnership with an Italian manufacturer, come with MB2 or Rockstar decals and can reach speeds of 50 mph. MB2 hosts corporate events and private parties, so be sure to check its raceway calendars at Thousand Oaks or Sylmar before you swing by.

There are dozens of reasons to want to pilot a go-kart through a winding gully of piled tires, but the folks behind the MB2 Raceway won’t be bound by such terrestrial mainsprings. “It is our belief,” they say “that nothing Fuels the Human Spirit like the Challenge of Racing.” (Note: Your Groupon includes helmet rental.)

Take that, Kierkegaard.

Reviews

The LA Times writes, “MB2 regularly hosts professional race drivers & action sports athletes, Hollywood celebrity types and, racing tournaments and private events.” The Tolucan Times says, “Are you looking for an exciting way to spend the day (or night) but don’t want to spend a lot of your hard-earned money? … I recently visited MB2 Raceway, a quarter-mile indoor track with electric go kart racing in Sylmar, and it was the perfect way for me to blow off some steam!”

Yelpers give the Sylmar branch four stars and the Thousand Oaks branch a 4.5 (though they say there are longer waits for Thousand Oaks): > * I just found the antidote to road rage inducing traffic! The MB2 Raceway is an indoor racetrack with an everchanging track design complete with hairpin turns, and 20 plus go-karts … I tell you, normal driving just isn’t the same after the speedway! – C.L., Sylmar > * So mucking fun! … When I got their [sic] I signed up (for the first time) and was racing in a matter of 10 minutes. Highly recommended. – Christopher D., Sylmar > * “They are using Italian electric powered go karts that top out at 50mph and feel like it. These things are not powered by a lawnmower motor and haul a–. It is also surprising how much of a workout it is to be cranking a little car around some sharp turns.” – James P. Thousand Oaks > * “Really fun, and reasonably priced. The wait is kind of long…an hour or so… but they’re open until midnight which is pretty awesome!” – Mia T., Thousand Oaks

MB2's Philosophy Prior To Copyediting

Before hiring a copyeditor to pare down MB2’s philosophy to a web-friendly length, there was a much longer version (words that made the cut to the edited version in bold):

Nothing that exists in this world with the exception of energy drinks or prayer Fuels or powers or incites with great fervor and fervor that is almost as great the stuff that the Human or the Human Spirit which glows in the dark and wears leather boots like or such as or vis-a-vis the brutal, oppressive, downright awesome Challenge of fate-defying, spirit-lifting, very fast Racing except maybe the lottery, or not wearing a shirt in a restaurant that specifically says “no shirt, no service.”