According to an old saying, your home is your castle, your television is your court jester, and your dog is your moat. Repel invading dust-bunny hordes with today's Groupon: for $38, you get two hours of home cleaning (a $76.50 value), plus $20 toward cleaning products from Miss'es Clean. This Groupon can be redeemed at homes in the following areas: Beamsville, Jordan Station, Niagara-on-the-Lake, St. Catharines, St. Davids, Thorold, Vineland Station, Virgil, and Welland. Additional cleaning is available at a discounted rate of $20 an hour for Groupon customers.

Miss'es Clean's crew of insured dirt-wranglers brandish 100% organic, Canada-made cleaning products to de-grime sullied abodes. After clearing rooms of small furniture and human-sized hamster balls, cleaning cadres scrub up to 600 square feet over the course of two hours. Mop-wielders will happily hone in on the area of the customer’s choice, be it a soiled kitchen, shambled living room, or dusty Bobblehead shrine. All necessary equipment and supplies are brought by Miss'es Clean's crew, granting clients the freedom to sit back and relax as houses regain their lustrous sheen.

After the cleaners leave, homesteaders can keep houses gleaming like a firefly's engagement ring with Miss'es Clean's supply of organic cleaning products. 500 mL of Mother's Choice ($12.95) treats homes with nontoxic, biodegradable enzymes mighty enough to handle the most tenacious stains; Blue Wonder microfiber cleaning cloths ($25–$34) eliminate paper towel waste and save homeowners money that can go toward replacing staircases with waterslides.