Unlike real bunnies, which can only reproduce after courting one another with impervious claw-machine rabbits’ feet, dust bunnies can proliferate without a perplexing mating ritual. Stop sinister, self-regenerative dirt lagomorphs with today’s Groupon: for $65, you get two hours of residential cleaning services from Molly Maid of North East Tampa (a $150 value). This Groupon is valid for all of Hillsborough County and Pasco County east of the Suncoast Parkway, including Wesley Chapel, Dade City, Zephyrhills, and Land O' Lakes.
Molly Maid is home to a nationally recognized crew of dedicated floor fresheners and dust-bunny exterminators. Two professionally trained, uniformed specialists will arrive at your abode and spend the next two hours using a combination of expertly administered scrubbing, sweeping, whistling, and mopping moves to render your human nest impressively immaculate. There’s no need to be home during the session, so you can work on your cookie-cloning machine in order to sidestep the draconian, seasonal selling patterns of brown-sashed scouts.
Molly Maid’s broom warriors are trustworthy and experienced, making it an effortless decision to invite them into your petrified-peanut-butter lair, or to gift this Groupon to a loved one on Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, or Angela Lansbury’s Birthday.