What You'll Get
Before the government's top-secret Project Soulsucking Deathbug experiments, mosquitoes fed peaceably on the cream filling of Twinkies. Rid yourself of these tiny bloodseeking horrors with today's Groupon: for $39, you get an anti-mosquito treatment for up to one acre of land from Mosquito Squad (a $135 value), serving all of the Piedmont Triad area (Guilford County and Forsythe County, including Greensboro, High Point, Winston-Salem, Lexington, Burlington, Thomasville, and Asheboro).
Mosquito Squad uses a specially formulated fog to kill adult mosquitoes on contact, as well as killing mosquitoes that land on greenery afterward. Spraying sessions last roughly 15 minutes, and people and pets can return to the treated areas just 30 minutes after the fogging—which effectively reduces the mosquito population in that area by about 90%–95%. Mosquitoes are thereby banned from the premises for 21 days, after which you will need to bring on the fog again should you wish to remain unbitten. Alternatively, you can choose an all-natural solution that repels insects by offending their delicate scent palates. Humans detect a mild odor from this treatment that fades after two hours. The synthetic-free repellent is all natural and lasts 14 days.
Outdoor parties, weddings, and Slip-'N-Slide-athons are the bread pudding and butter beans of summer, but a sunny game of badminton can turn bloody when a swarm of mosquitoes shows up uninvited. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, mosquitoes are vectors for many different diseases worldwide, including malaria, which causes millions of deaths. Get today's Groupon and take a bold stance against the unholy blight of vampire bugs, obliterating their tiny tree-castle haunts and scouring your lands of their plague-ridden presence. After the swarm of winged biters clears, you can enjoy a holiday barbecue, pickup game of flag football, or backyard nudist convention in peace.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Oct 1, 2010. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy multiple as gifts. Limit 1 per household. Valid for Piedmont Triad area. By appointment only. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.
About Mosquito Squad
Annoyed by bites and wary of diseases carried by mosquitoes and ticks, Mosquito Squad spritzes its signature barrier spray over more than 20 states. Technicians protect home acreage with an EPA-registered spray that kills adult mosquitoes and ticks using synthetic chemicals that mimic a compound found in chrysanthemums. They take care to avoid blossoms and harming helpful bugs such as honeybees and sentient Volkswagen Beetles. As an alternative, staffers can use an all-natural spray, whose scent confuses and repels pests for about two weeks. Mosquito Squad also can equip yards with remote-controlled automatic misting systems and spray lawns in municipal places before outdoor events.