Keeping teeth clean and white is the first and only step in coping with the fact that your skeleton is slowly escaping from your body through your mouth. Deal with it with today's Groupon: for $49, you get a 30-minute teeth-whitening session at MYA PureO2 on Wellington Street (a $200 value).

The whitening wizards at MYA PureO2 emancipate smiles from stains and other discoloration during a 30-minute treatment session. Clients can cure teeth sullied from bad habits such as smoking and bobbing for octopi by reclining into one of MYA PureO2's comfy treatment chairs while a noninvasive LED whitening process whitens their chompers quickly and safely. The well-trained technicians at MYA PureO2 utilize both iBrite and Beaming White LED technology to make smiles shades brighter during three 10-minute treatments. Whitening treatments at MYA PureO2 eschew the usual mouth trays typically used in LED procedures, resulting in there being no barrier between the light and the teeth. The lack of mouth-tray obstruction increases both the LED's whitening power as well as its ability to really get to know the patient. Buyers of this Groupon can call ahead to schedule an appointment.