Before the invention of clothing, human fashion was limited to tattoos, tan-line patterns, and handbags that matched one's ear hair. Revitalize the first fabric your bones ever wore with today's Groupon to New Life Anti-Aging on Wilmington Avenue. Choose between two options:
- For $99, you get $300 worth of cellulite-reduction treatments.
- For $100, you get a nonsurgical facelift (a $300 value).
New Life Anti-Aging is a full-service medical spa that employs a skin-centric staff of licensed aestheticians to perform all its cosmetic services. Cellulite treatments bombard problematic areas with space-age radiofrequency energy designed to soften the fibrous strands responsible for integumentary dimpling, potentially smoothing the skin as a result. Intended to remove both "hard" and "soft" cellulite, individual sessions target the backs of the legs from the knees up ($149), the abdomen ($149), or the entirety of both legs from the knees up ($249). The duration of these treatments depends on the region of the body being targeted as well as the time it takes the aesthetician to win at hide-and-seek before beginning. New Life Anti-Aging recommends multiple treatments for a single area to achieve optimal results. These treatments may be performed across multiple visits.
The nonsurgical facelift harnesses the power of selective radio thermoplasty to stimulate collagen and elastin production. The 30-minute procedure can tighten skin and help reduce wrinkles from the face and neck without anesthesia or the fashion-jeopardizing hospital gown associated with a surgical facelift. Without a scalpel in sight, a skin sorceress slays crow’s feet and laugh lines, tautens sagging eyelids, and sends under-eye bags to be sacrificed back to the earth. The dermis-rescuing procedure requires no downtime, so you can immediately return to normal activities.