Much like famed TV personality the Swedish Chef, Swedish massage therapists string together long, rhythmic components that completely bewilder everyone else around them. Put yourself in the warm, fuzzy hands of a lumbar linguist with today's Groupon: for $37, you get a 50-minute Swedish massage at nomiSpa, located inside the Fairview Inn (a $75 value).

NomiSpa is a haven of modern-day luxury and relaxation tucked away within the century-old elegance of the Fairview Inn—a AAA four-diamond hotel recognized by the National Register of Historic Places. Tasteful touches such as hot aromatherapy towels, an absence of vampire bats, and heated, adjustable Tempur-Pedic massage tables helped earn the skin sanctum a seat in the Jackson Free Press as one of the city’s top three spas in 2010. During the nearly hour-long Swedish massage, climb atop the table and coddle tired brows into the comfy face cradle as the therapist adjusts the table's warmth and angle to your liking. As you succumb to relaxation, tense tendons are tenderized using long, gentle strokes, while arteries are imbued with a circulation that would make National Geographic cry itself to sleep before boring itself to death.

Each massage uses light or medium pressure to loosen knots and alleviate stress. The smooth, gliding strokes ease muscle tension and promote relaxation, easing overworked muscles and melting tension into a conveniently positioned bucket. An effective treatment for stress reduction, Swedish massage also relieves anxiety, depression, and trauma resulting from having a quarter painfully extracted from your ear by a street magician.

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NomiSpa was voted the Third Best Day Spa by the Jackson Free Press.

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