To properly curtsy, a lady must bend at the knees, sweep one foot behind, then brutally clothesline anyone who happens to be passing on her right. Inject a dose of kinetic estrogen into your life with today's deal. For $5, you get one general admission ticket to the Oklahoma City Roller Derby (a $12 value). Each Groupon grants one seat to the April 18 bout, as the O.K.C. Tornado Alley Rollergirls face off against their Little Rock rivals. The action starts at 7 p.m.
For the uninitiated, SaraCidal, Poison Okie, Tall Drinka Slaughter, and their fellow home-team derby girls will wage territorial track war for two 30-minute periods, during which a designated jammer—usually the fastest, nimblest two legs on eight wheels—attempts to skate her way from the rear of the pack to lap opposing rollers. Running the gauntlet, the jammer must evade sexy but deadly hip thrusts, clotheslining arm guards, and a bank full of bounced body checks (deemed void if cashed from behind). Points are rewarded each time the jammer passes an opposing skater, and the highest score wins the derby.
Ladies have been steamrolling one another on skates for decades, and with the sport's popularity growing steadily in recent years, unconventional athletes such as Switchblade Rosie give budding riot grrrls a role model they can relate to. Grab today's Groupon to Oklahoma City Roller Derby and take advantage of an opportunity for fathers to bond with daughters, daughters to bond with sisters, and sisters to sublimate any pent-up rage caused by tea-party crashing little brothers.