Bodies of water are frequent metaphors in poetry, due to their unfathomable depths, unknowable sprawl, and unattainable porpoises. Set sail into the enigma with today's Groupon: for $39, you get two tickets to Friday Fun Night from Paddlewheeler Riverboat Cruises (a $79.90 value) at the Westminster Waterfront in New Westminster.

The 100-passenger M.V. Native cruises the historic Fraser River as guests mingle, dance, and sightsee during their three hours aboard ship. After a hectic workweek full of haughty bosses and snarky telegrams, cut proverbial rugs to the festive beats of an onboard DJ, or cool off on the upper deck for spectacular views of the sunset behind the coastal mountains. Though not included in the value of the Groupon, an oaken bar pours out libations and a snack selection to fuel skeletal muscles into dance floor feats, such as licking an elbow.