What You'll Get
Paintball is like a production of Macbeth: it’s exciting, demanding, and by the end, everyone has pretend-died. Strut across the stage like a well-armed player with today’s Groupon: for $17, you get a paintball outing, complete with all the necessary equipment—including paintball gun, mask, barrel bag, pod pack (with two pods), and chest protector—as well as 500 paintballs (a $35 value) at Paintball Asylum in southwest Louisville.
The Asylum features several competition arenas totaling 30 acres, including a wood course with two-story castles, junked cars, muddy trails, and creeks, as well as more straightforward speedball, airball, and hyperball fields, each designed to test different skills and strategies with fast-paced, pro-tournament-quality action. Whichever you choose, each area is perpetually refereed, guaranteeing fair play and providing for plenty of Asylum-organized tournament play and special scenarios. If your projectile paintbrush should jam, Asylum’s expert on-site pro-shop techs will get you up and blasting in no time flat.
Soon after suiting up you’ll be crawling on your belly over rocks and dashing between bunkers as small paint-filled capsules whiz past your ears, tucking, rolling, and shouting in slow motion as you pummel your enemies, best friends, or co-workers in a splatter of color. Be sure to dress appropriately: the paint washes out of clothing, but you’re going to get really dirty, no matter how gifted a sharpshooter you may be. Also, strap into sturdy boots. If you’ve always wished the work of John Woo was more like that of Jackson Pollock and vice versa, you’ve found your new home.
Players must be 10 or older; those under 18 require parent or guardian signature. Reservations required.
Check out some paintball action that took place at Paintball Asylum for the Mid South Xball League:
Here’s what PBReviewers are saying about them: > * The refs were very nice and helped me gain confedence [sic] that it doesn’t hurt (and I soon found out that it doesn’t). – MuHkNy > * The fields where [sic] great and the set up of the whole facility was awesome – bunkerboydrew
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Dec 16, 2010. Amount paid never expires. Limit 2 per person, may buy multiple as gifts. Must be at least 10. Must sign waiver; under 18 must have parent or legal guardian sign waiver. Not valid with other offers. Reservation required. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.
About Paintball Asylum
Paintball Asylum's more than 40 acres of playing fields beckon competitors to duck and dive behind bunkers or dart through buildings. Visitors paint opponents' chest canvases with acrylic bullets on two turf air-ball fields, playing high-speed games that resemble professional teams or replays of pickup games on fast-forward. The village field challenges players as they skulk over two bridges, through several buildings, and around three cars. Meanwhile, 20 acres of wooded fields scattered with bunkers offer an expansive space to reign victorious over an opposing team and act out the last scene of Hamlet in the shade of an oak tree. A fully stocked pro shop arms players with acrylic artillery, and teams can swing by Paintball Asylum for tournaments, clinics, and scenario games hosted throughout the year.