Eating is necessary for human survival, along with breathing, sleeping, and remaining still while a curious velociraptor rummages through your closet. Practice survival tactics with today’s Groupon: for $7, you get $15 worth of American fare at Patriots Diner in Woonsocket.
Open 24 hours a day, Patriots Diner's expansive menu bursts with fluffy omelettes, thick french-toast slices, 13 wraps, and giant burgers. Breakfast is served all day, and the chefs expertly lasso onions, green peppers, and ham before hog-tying them inside a western omelettes ($7.95), and french toast arrives stuffed with a choice of berries ($7.95). Like cotton candy or a clown wearing a tuxedo, a pizza chickenburger, laden with mozzarella cheese and tomato sauce ($5.85 for plain; $8.30 for deluxe), is not quite one thing and not quite the other. Diners can opt for a Patriots special, such as the spinach-pie dinner with greek salad ($8.95) or select one of 13 wraps stuffed with ingredients such as chicken breast, grilled portobello mushrooms, and feta cheese ($9.25).
Patriots Diner is a throwback to the 1950s, a time when restaurants and soda fountains served as important hubs of socialization. The menu there deepens nostalgia with dishes that the owners hope emulates the cooking most people grew up with. Under glowing lights like hanging martini glasses, plates brim with juicy burgers, fish and chips, meat loaf, and pork chops. Coffee cups warm hands next to all-day breakfast offerings of omelets and waffles beneath walls decorated with vintage magazine covers and photos of Christopher Columbus’ wooden scuba flippers. The restaurant’s neon-blue lights are easily seen from the roadside and match the dining room’s royal blue booths and chrome-trimmed stools.
65 Founders Dr.
Woonsocket, Rhode Island 02895