Without birthday parties, children could not understand the passage of time, creating lifelong tardiness and confusion about when to dress as a Valentine's ghoul. Foster Gregorian fun with today's Groupon: for $69, you get a dance birthday-party package for up to 15 guests at Planet Dance Uptown on Cincinnati Columbus Road (a $150 value).
Planet Dance Uptown coordinates shindigs for youngsters in three dance studios, all sporting floating wood floors with marley surfaces expertly tuned for floorboard-pounding. The trained instructors—who have been featured on everything from Broadway to MTV—specialize in myriad dance styles, so kids can pirouette at a ballerina party or learn to expertly cut a rug at a hip-hop hoopla.
The package includes a 45-minute dance class with a performance at the end for parents and 15 minutes of instructor-led games. The festivities continue with 45 minutes of cake and presents and 15 minutes of free time to practice artistic physical interpretations of cake and presents. Although this Groupon covers up to 15 guests, additional guests can be added for $5 each. An unlimited number of parents are welcome to participate, unlike on first dates with reigning prom viceroys.