Left to its own devices, carpet hoards dirt, hair, grime, and used cars, eventually transforming into a full-fledged junkyard overrun with angry raccoons. Keep the outdoors out of the indoors with today's Groupon: for $99, you get six areas—or up to 1,500 square feet—of carpet cleaning from Priority Carpet and Tile Cleaning (a $199 value).

Priority Carpet's carpet-cleaning service takes care of filthy fibers with a three-stage cleaning method. Each dirt-divulging session starts out with a thorough vacuuming, if necessary, and an all-natural pretreatment to loosen existential grit. Next, Priority Carpet's experienced technicians evict shag-sitting particles and other dulling debris using the grime-fighting power and futuristic beeps of a deep steam-cleaning machine. The whole process is nontoxic, so it leaves behind no sticky residue, just soft, fluffy carpeting so clean that a family of neatniks could eat off it. And since a carpet is basically just one big air filter, carpet owners can literally breathe easier after a visit from Priority Carpet's rug wranglers. Customers can de-gunk carpets in any six home areas of their choice, including bedrooms, living rooms, and green rooms.