All reviews are from people who have redeemed deals with this merchant.
What You'll Get
Massage was developed by NASA to help astronauts cope with edgy Tang-induced sugar highs, lack of ESPN, and predatory aliens stowed away in the hangar bay. Achieve its soothing effects outside the soul-crushing abyss of outer space with today’s deal: for $29, you get a one-hour massage of your choice (a $65 value) at Rejuvenate Mind-Body Wellness Center in Lee's Summit. Just like using an ATM, appointments are mandatory. If you change your mind and cancel an appointment, you must do so within 48 hours of your scheduled time or your Groupon will become invalid.
At Rejuvenate Mind-Body Wellness Center, visitors can simultaneously improve their physical and mental well-being while enjoying one of twelve stress-melting massages. Instead of a gargantuan monkey-fist-pounding dished out by a seething silverback gorilla, tensed patrons can opt for a one-hour massage that irons out back kinks and induces a blissful state of clear-headedness. A Swedish massage uses long, soothing strokes to shed worldly worries. The sports massage keeps active fleshoskeletons in tip-top shape, and a deep-tissue massage homes in on bothersome muscle areas with focused, pinpoint stimulation and high-powered satellite imagery. Prenatal, neuromuscular, lymphatic drainage, and reflexology massages are also available. Rejuvenate's talented and experienced staff of muscle maestros traverses back canvasses with a deft touch and skilled knuckle wagons to ensure that bodily stress is removed and bodily motor oil drained into a metallic pan.
In addition to reducing stress and anxiety levels, a skillfully applied massage can keep the mind and body functioning at optimal levels and improve immune-system functions, just like playing Tetris for 14 hours straight. Visitors of Rejuvenate Mind-Body Wellness Center will leave with their muscular fibers singing as harmoniously as a barbershop quartet, instead of screeching like the lead singer in a Norwegian death-metal barbershop quartet.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Dec 31, 2011. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may purchase multiple as gifts. No cash value. Not valid with other offers. By appointment only. 48-hr. cancellation policy or Groupon is forfeited. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.
About Rejuvenate Mind-Body Wellness Center
The Rejuvenate Mind-Body Wellness Center team of psychologists, chiropractors and massage therapists combine their areas of expertise to holistically heal minds and bodies. Their core philosophy states that health is tied not only to diet and exercise, but to emotion as well. By marrying therapeutic treatments such as chiropractic with massage therapy and psychology sessions, patients approach their well being with the correct state of mind while unlocking repressed dreams of drowning in a sea of Twinkie cream.