A perfectly white smile determines how others perceive you by shining brightly enough to blind them to your second head and compound eyes. Let dazzling teeth disguise the effects of your mad-science hobby with today’s Groupon: for $89, you get a Zoom! whitening treatment (a $595 value) at SoFi Dental Care & Orthodontics in Miami Beach.

Dedicated to reviving and highlighting each patient's picturesque pearly whites through state-of-the-art cosmetic technology, SoFi Dental Care & Orthodontics doles out high-quality ministrations at the hands of a highly specialized staff. Capable of whitening teeth an average of eight shades, the Zoom! teeth-whitening treatment begins as a skilled technician applies a specially formulated gel to the tooth enamel, protecting the lips and gums and guaranteeing your teeth top-billing in the impending spotlight. Next, the gel is activated under the brightening beans of the Zoom! light, penetrating the dingy dentile surface to break down stains over three consecutive 15-minute sessions. After the quick, gentle procedure, calcium stacks become noticeably whiter and Zoom! guarantees results are longer lasting than those obtained with at-home bleaching trays, strips, or an all-chalk diet.

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