The surging trend in teen delinquency known as grand theft chemistry—hijacking a truck carrying toxic ooze and driving it into a nearby body of water—has caused the sea-monster population to rise exponentially in recent years. Today's Groupon supports your right to enjoy a relaxing dip without risk of a mutated starfish sucking out your spinal fluid: for $32, you get an initial balancing and stabilizing of your swimming pool (a $25 value) and one month of bi-weekly chemical servicing (a $40 value) from Splish Splash Pool Service (a $65 total value).
With more than 25 years of experience purifying pools in the greater Phoenix area, Splish Splash knows the ins and outs of pool maintenance like the back of its water-wrinkled hand. The process begins with an initial balancing and stabilizing of pool water to make sure your pH is in the neutral zone, while ensuring pitch-perfect underwater acoustics. The chemical treatment, the most popular Splish Splash service, uses a combination of chlorine tablets, shock treatments, pH balancers, conditioner, and a teaspoon of celery salt to shield your pool from the gooey green menace that is algae. Your backyard beach will receive a checkup and pampering every other week for a month.
Aside from being professionally trained, all Splish Splash employees are subjected to vigorous background checks, leaving your water professionally balanced and professionally safe. The safety extends to pets and children, as no chemicals are stored on your property. With harsh liquids stowed securely off-site, your garage and yard will be deemed as safe as your pool—and equally swimmable.
Cleaning not included. Green, algae-infested, and severely neglected pools will incur an extra charge depending upon the condition.