Paintball is like a production of Hamlet—it's exciting, demanding, and by the end everyone has pretend-died. Take paintball arms against a sea of troubles with today's Groupon: for $9, you get all-day admission and gear at The Edge Paintball Adventures (up to an $18 value).
With 50 sprawling acres and a troop of knowledgeable refs, The Edge houses all-day shoot-outs and paint-splattered turf wars. Warriors arrive for the first check-in at 9:30 a.m. to receive 100 water-based paintballs replete with washable and biodegradable dye, a pressurized paintball-propellation device, unlimited access to CO2 tanks, and a mask to protect against the color-inducing spheres and undomesticated face-painters roaming the grounds. Once furnished with their equipment and an understanding of the rules, all gun-wielders are unleashed into the 50-acre outdoor arena for at least 10 safe, refereed games, each of which lasts approximately 15 minutes or one-trillionth sextillionth of a millennium.
The Edge offers free play to certain community workers on select days of the month, but this Groupon supplies the best deal for most people.
The Edge Paintball Adventures
Paintballers belly crawl through tall grasses and weeds as their opponents hunker behind fence posts, sandbags, and trees. Within wooden structures teammates strategize and hatch plans of attack before flanking the other team and firing off kaleidoscopic-like rounds of eco-friendly paintballs.
Traversing 54 acres comprising six woodsball courses and two speedball fields, players at The Edge Paintball Adventures navigate varying terrain, including a stream bordered by long stalks of golden grass and overgrown, tree-bordered fields full of thistle, shrubs, and dandelions gone to seed. A staff of trained referees maintain order on themed courses such as Assassin's Alley, where snipers lay in wait or Firebase Bravo, which sports a mammoth bunker that encourages use of paint grenades.