Jump to: A Select Clientele
Today's deal can boost your healing factor into Wolverine territory without having to undergo outpatient adamantium injections. For $37, you can get a full exam, consultation, and adjustment from either Whole Family Chiropractic in St. Paul (a $135 value) or The Family Wellness Institute in Minneapolis (a $147 value).
The quality of care and exams are identical at each location. Both Doctors of Chiropractic Tye Moe (certified by the National Board of Chiropractic Examiners) and Matthew Hanson (specializes in highly specific, effective, and gentle chiropractic care for the whole family) start your exam with hands-on palpation before comparing heat differences along the spine and evaluating its surface electrical impulses. Both doctors will explain the tests and findings during your consultation, as well as suggest the most effective treatment. From there, they'll gently adjust any vertebral subluxations: no drugs, no surgery, no more recurring nightmares in which your spine jumps out of your back to join a basketball team.
Chiropractic is well known for treating back pain, but it's also effective treatment for neck pain, headaches, sports injuries, pregnancies, and repetitive stress injuries, such as Punter's Knee, Politician's Wrist, and the Douglas MacArthur. Chiropractic is safe for all ages, so you can buy enough Groupons to relieve the suffering of your entire kink-backed brood.
A Select Clientele
Many rely on chiropractors for regular check-ups to maintain health and comfort. If you belong to one of these specialized subgroups, you might be interested in what a chiropractor can do for you:
Skeletons: Chiropractors typically work their magic through skin and muscle, but direct access to the vertebrae will allow them to realign your boney corpus, whether you’re preparing for a night of singing Cab Calloway in a cartoon cemetery or recovering from the arduous cycle of perpetually dropping from the rafters on a system of pulleys and wires.
Octopi: Compressing your entire body to squeeze through a gap the size of your own eyeball can cause undue strain on the ink bladder. A chiropractor can adapt to your unique physique with a warm-water tentacle stretch and massage, followed by refreshingly hurling you onto the ice at a Redwings game.
Robots: Your modular composition makes you the perfect candidate for a complete disassembly and compressed air dusting, followed by an isopropyl alcohol bath and quick and painless meltdown, you deceitful metal snake.
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