"You'll shoot your eye out!" That classic line spews from TV sets nationwide every December as '40s cherub Ralphie Parker -- oversized glasses, dapper sweater and meticulously combed blond hair -- struggles to find compassion in a world of dream-crushing adults. His Christmas wish is simple: to get a Red Ryder BB gun. Or, more specifically, a "Red Ryder carbine-action, 200-shot range model air rifle with a compass in the stock and this thing which tells time." But the grown-ups in his life are having none of it. Now his misadventures have moved from the screen to the stage with A Christmas Story: The Musical. Produced by the film's original Ralphie, Peter Billingsley, this musical spectacular is witty holiday entertainment with a heart of gold (and a tacky leg lamp). Journey back to a simpler time thanks to this amazing Theatre Under the Stars production at Hobby Center for the Performing Arts in Houston.