The Tooth Fairy is a burglarizing fetishist specializing in black-market ivory trade, and she must be stopped. Today’s Groupon for Union Square Dental or 54th Street Dental helps keep teeth in mouths and out of the hands of maniacal, winged phantasms. Choose between two options:
- For $49, you get a dental exam, cleaning, and x-rays (a $435 value).
- For $125, you get a teeth whitening procedure (a $600 value).
The dental dream team of knowledgeable, friendly toothists specializes in gentle, thorough dentistry. During a detailed oral exam, they'll dutifully inspect each pearly white before it is photographed by the incisor paparazzi, yielding a revealing set of digital x-rays. Next, your dentist will treat mouth bones to a comprehensive cleaning—removing all traces of plaque and unsightly marshmallows—before finishing with a light whitening polish. You'll leave with teeth so squeaky clean that spinach will slide right over its favorite crevices, and a force field of spotless shine will repel Milk Duds from your molars.
Both offices are committed to using state-of-the-art technology, including iPads and other digital devices, to educate patients and play epic games of Tetris. The cozy 54th Street office boasts a waiting room stocked with comfy, enamel-white couches and chairs, ensuring your visit will be a pleasant, piranha-free experience.