Like a football field, hair must be cut and manicured, lest it grow unmanageable, become tangled, and repel squads of amorous cheerleaders. Keep heads trim and desirable with today's Groupon to Urban Male Salon on Leggett Drive. Choose between the following options:

• For $22, you get the UM Signature Package, which includes a haircut, mini manicure, neck-and-shoulder massage, and more (a $45 value).
• For $25, you get a one-hour Swedish massage (a $ 50 value).

Urban Male Salon's accommodating professionals wrangle wild tresses into well-mannered coifs with big-city poise. Lean back during the UM Signature Package while a shampoo and conditioning treatment washes away scalp soil and stray sticky notes. Then mop molders will shape manes with a customized haircut and style, complete with a soothing scalp massage. As worldly stress and desperate plans of identity alteration melt away with a face-moisturizing hot-towel treatment, hands that have permanently tightened into fists will loosen into softer, more holdable creatures with a mini Man-icure. Afterward, scissor wielders will shampoo away loitering hair shards and provide a free touch-up within two weeks of your initial appointment.

Both men and women can relax during a traditional 60-minute Swedish massage, which uses long, connective strokes and kneading to improve blood flow, stimulate the lymphatic system, relieve physical tension, and melt stress into a puddle of biodegradable papier-mâché. First-time customers are asked to arrive 10 minutes early to complete paperwork.