What You'll Get
Without legs, pants would be out of work and the expression "nice stems" could only be used to harass shrinking violets. Feel comfortable in your much-needed lower limbs with today's Groupon: for $150, you get a spider-vein removal treatment on both legs at Varicose Vein Solutions (a $300 value).
Board-certified Dr. Zapata exterminates unsightly veins from limbs with safe, practically painless laser-removal treatments. After torso pedestals receive a local anesthetic, the dedicated doctor hunts down offending veins with laser energy and banishes them to the back of a DMV line during lunch hour. Patients may feel some tenderness after the roughly hour-long procedure, but like an embarrassing memory submerged in invisible ink, the feeling should disappear well within a month. Legs should avoid swimming, vigorous gym workouts, very hot baths, and excessive sun exposure for two weeks following the vein ousting.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires May 6, 2012. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy 2 additional as gifts. Limit 1 per visit. By appointment only. 24hr cancellation notice required. All treatments must apply to 1 area. No cash back. Not valid with other offers. Tax included. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.
About Varicose Solutions
Technology meets beauty at Varicose Solutions, where the physician leads clients to flawless skin and tighter tummies. During his laser vein treatments, he uses a thin laser fiber to lessen the appearance of large varicose veins. Laser pixel sessions, meanwhile, resurface the skin to remove fine lines and shallow acne scars. The physician also eliminates moles and warts, and makes sagging skin as youthful and smooth as a laminated high-school yearbook photo with non-invasive tightening procedures. Beyond skincare, Varicose Solutions shrinks fat cells using nothing more than a small incision and an advanced laser device.